Winnie the Pooh: A Body Confidence Icon

In the ethers of the internet, tucked away amongst Pinterest posts and mums’ Facebook feeds is an inspirational quote:

“Winnie the Pooh wore crop tops with no pants, ate his favourite food and loved himself. You can too.”

Is this what A. A Milne had in mind when he created the lovable bear? Most likely not, but nonetheless it’s a pretty sweet, if not slightly sickly, sentiment. In my last post, I briefly touched on body confidence when playing the dating game. However, body confidence is not merely a player. It’s a game within itself.

In my experience — alongside talking to my friends and having access to social media — body confidence is like playing Snakes and Ladders. There will be times where you’re so up and self-assured, only to suddenly tumble down and wonder how on earth you’re meant to start climbing again. To make matters worse, these moments can happen without warning and you’re not sure where you’ll land.

When I first started playing, being at the bottom was the easiest move. Initially, I didn’t even think of it as a tactic. I just couldn’t see any other option. The negative thoughts in my head were so abrasive and loud. They took up so much room. What else was I meant to think? Plus, there was something surprisingly soothing about believing every possible bad thing my brain could throw at me. I felt like it was helping me to see myself how others truly saw me. I deserved to feel that way and there was no other option.

Getting on the first rung of the ladder proved to be difficult. I had to find something — anything — I liked about myself. Emphasis on the like. I could not imagine love. If you were to look back over my fledgeling years of posting my feelings on the internet — and trust me that’s not necessary — you would find me writing about how I loathed the advice to ‘love yourself.’ I could barely tolerate looking at my own reflection. How was I meant to suddenly believe the opposite of what my brain had been telling me for years?

I had to start small because it felt nearly impossible to shift those heavy emotions. I scrambled for any image positive thoughts I could muster. My hair wasn’t greasy. My feet weren’t too weird. My lips looked ok with this lipstick. Slowly, but surely, my mindset started to move in a promising direction. This outfit was flattering. My hair looked good today. My legs look nice. It was like spoon-feeding a stroppy toddler, forcing these thoughts into my head.

I’m pleased to say progress was made, the negativity grew smaller as I began to climb the ladder. I can vividly remember the first summer I wore a bikini. There is a picture of me in the ocean. I’m facing the camera, my arms are stretched out wide and I’m grinning. I was soaking up the sun and the moment. My body was out — stomach rolls, flabby arms — and I felt absolutely liberated.

I’d be lying if I told you I completely love my body. I still think that’s a hard thing to say, but do you know what gets easier the more you do it? Complimenting your body, rather than criticising it. I cannot stress enough how good it feels to be kind to yourself. For years I thought finding flaws was what I was supposed to do. Then I was confused when I got told to love myself. Girls like me couldn’t do that, could they?

Even though it’s a silly thing on the internet, I wish I read something like that Winnie the Pooh quote when I was younger. I was allowed to feel confident in a body like mine. Being bigger did not rule out the possibility of being seen as beautiful. Confident. Happy. Dare I say, sexy.

I didn’t realise how heavy I was making myself. I’m not talking about my weight. Positive thoughts are so much lighter to carry. You’re not climbing, you’re floating. I take such joy in finding ways to appreciate my body and everything it does for me, rather than attack it for the ways it looks.

As I said, body confidence is a perilous game and there are moments where you fall down. However, just because you’ve fallen down doesn’t mean you’ve immediately lost all that progress you’ve made. You don’t have to start right from the beginning again. If I catch myself falling, I know it won’t be all the way down. I can look back on my progress and be proud of how far I’ve come.

I think there’s a notable difference between my confidence now versus ten years ago. Though it still feels like an alien word to me. There are people who tell me I’m confident, and my mind reels from that information. I have to remind myself that body confidence is a shifting process rather than a single state. Some days I’ll be it, and others I won’t. My mind will move fleetingly around the board, focusing on flaws or finding ways to compliment myself.

While body confidence is hard and frustratingly unpredictable, it’s still worth trying. A small compliment you tell yourself can have such a powerful impact over the dozens of negative niggles. For all those lows you go through, the highs are waiting for you to feel them. Whether you want to be like Winnie and wear the crop top, or find a moment in the day to be kind to yourself — it’s up to you what your next move is.